Welcome to Our House - The Analogy ©

Having a baby is special. For some, it’s a lifelong dream, for others, a wonderful surprise. Either way, many of us have thought about taking this journey and whether it’s planned or a pleasant surprise, we all have preconceived ideas about what our child will look and be like. But what if it isn’t what we planned or expected? This is a short story I have written for parents who have or are expecting an exceptionally special child.

Welcome to our House – An analogy

After many months of dreaming, you finally decide it’s time. You are going to build that perfect house of your dreams. You have saved and saved, and now it’s time to put your plan into action. You find a wonderful, perfect piece of land in the city. It’s exactly what you are looking for – because it’s the plan that everyone talks about. You envision the all brick house sitting on luscious green grass, surrounded by a white picket fence. Inside is a marble foyer leading into a family room with beautiful oak hardwood floors. Granite lines the kitchen counter tops and there is an island sink in the middle. Upstairs has four perfect bedrooms and the master bedroom has an ensuite bathroom and an enormous walk-in closet, of course. It’s truly a dream come true, and it’s only a matter of time. You purchase the land and think to yourself, in nine short months, you will have it all.

But suddenly your agent calls to tell you, the land is not properly zoned, and the city has not approved it for building your perfect home. They have instead, given you land in the country, where an old country home sits. You are absolutely devastated, your dreams vanishing right before your eyes. You know you can’t back out now, you need a place to live, and despite it not being what you wanted, you know that somehow you will manage and that you can continue on.

You tell everyone what has happened, and everyone is disappointed, some even offering their condolences. You know that everyone else has a nice city home, and that was what you had planned, but you have to come to terms with the fact that you must learn to live in the country.

You go to see the property every month until closing and something funny happens. You start to fall in love with the place. The air is fresh, it’s peaceful and serene. There’s a pond on the land, and the house, though not a new all brick home, is quaint, and has lots of hidden potential. You soon realize it’s not a awful place, it’s just a different place. It’s slower paced than the city, less noisy and flamboyant, but it’s beautiful none the less. And in the process, you soon realize you may even get to meet some new and wonderful neighbours.

Its closing day and you suddenly find yourself full of anticipation, but you are still a little worried. After all, it isn’t what you had originally hoped for, and the house may need some repairs. But you are determined to accept it, and tackle everything one step at a time. You open the front door, and suddenly you are thrilled with what you see. The house is lovely, and has lots of character. The rooms are smaller but it’s decorated with beautiful attention and detail. The kitchen has marble instead of granite, and the bathroom has a soaker tub instead of a Jacuzzi. There isn’t a walk-in closet in sight, but the rooms all come with an indescribable view. Somehow, you just know that it was always meant to be and that this is now home.

This is my analogy of what it will be like for people who discover that they will be caring for a baby with Down syndrome. For us, it is not a terrible place to be, it is a journey full of surprises, milestones and discovery like any other child. And as the story suggests, sometimes it’s only a matter of ‘point of view’, and surprisingly, once you have been there, you don’t want to be anywhere else. The journey, like all others doesn’t come without some bumps in the road, but once you find your way, it’s all about the place you discovered, in most cases - quite by random chance
Author: Sandi Graham-McWade, Copyright

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Thursday, July 15, 2010

My Journal - Week 47 (15Jul10)

The count down begins....

Today Hunter is exactly 11 months old.  You know, I always say it - time just literally flies by.  I don't even know where the time has gone, but I do know the results of the time are apparent.  Growing, talking, sitting, crawling, transitioning, standing and the list goes on.

This week Hunter is sporting another haircut, and these days the clippers are not his favourite friend.  The sound literally sparks his water works.  I now realize it is the sound he doesn't like, he loves getting his hair cut, just not with sheers.  I noticed the last time I got a new tattoo (for our little angel Taylor) and I totted Hunter along with me, he sat happily in his stroller until my friend Paige started tattooing.  The tears started and I wasn't sure why.  It then dawned on me that the sound of the tattooing is nearly exactly the same as the hair clippers.  He went from happy clapping Hunter to bawling baby Hunter.  Now, I know some of you must be thinking, what in the world was I doing at a tattoo place with my son.  The place I go to for my tattoos is a friendly clean and not your typical "tattooing shop".  As a police officer, (of which my tattooing friends know) I am obsessed with making sure things are on the up and up before I subject myself to their services.  I have known the crew there for years, and so has Daddy.  They all know Hunter, and have seen him on a drop in visit when he was just eight weeks old.  He loves the girls & guys there, and always offers them a wave and a giant smile.  Anyway, knowing that hair clippers cause this much frustration, I had avioded using them for a while, but with this hot and humid weather, along with the fact that Hunter's hair is the same as Daddy's (grows like a weed), I opted to do a number two buzz.  I braced myself for the crying, which when doing his hair is often louder than the noisy clippers, and did my best to do a fast buzzing job.  I managed to do (what I think was) the fastest hair buzz on record.  I did litterally five swipes over his head, and was done in under two minutes.  Some stray hairs were long, which sissors fixed up easily.  Now I have a semi-bald looking baby, but I know it wont last long at all.  I am not sure what caused Hunter to go from tolerant of hair clippers to full out crazy crying.  I guess it is just one of those things!  Hopefully he will grow out of the fear, and I think if I show him Daddy getting it done more often, he might be less frightened by the sound.  The thing is, I give Daddy number two buzzes nearly every three weeks, so I am not sure how much demonstrating I need to do to achieve that!

More importantly and finally, Mommy got the transition sitting on video!  Hunter had been transitioning into sitting from a crawling or tummy position for about a week now, but getting it on video was another story!
And it was perfect timing, since today the 15th, Hunter is 11 months old!  Getting the transition sitting on video took a bit of coaxing, (I demonstrated it for Hunter twice first) and voilà, he did it right after.  I was so happy for Hunter doing it on video, it was like I needed to have a celebration party!
This morning he was clapping happily while jumping in his Jumperoo, so I thought I would get him to clap for the video also, but it appears he thinks sitting for the video is enough for one shot, and quite honestly he's right.   The video here is 4 min 52 sec long.  Worth the five minutes to watch!

 Now, I am wondering when the walking will come....!

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