My Journal - Week 42 (08Jun10)

The path to healing....

After an extremely long, exhausting, and emotional  day (and night), I am finally home.  I had my appointment with the hospital yesterday (Monday) at 11:00 am and was eventually scheduled for surgery at 10:00 pm at night.  Because of being in the Emergency Department I had to endure a lengthy wait to speak with the on call doctor and I had no choice but to wait. 

I had my moments of clarity and then moments of extreme sadness.  It was certainly one of the more tougher days I have ever had to deal with on a personal level.  In all the time that I was there, waiting to have the surgery, I missed my son so terribly who was at home with Grandma and in great capable hands.  I had never been away from Hunter for 12 hours at a time, and I felt as though I were abandoning him.  I know he didn't feel that way, as he is such a happy-go-lucky boy and enjoyed his time all day with Grandma.  I am sure I suffered more not being with him then he did of me!

John and his Mom (my other mom) stayed with me the entire time.  I had a great support system and in those moments of sadness, they were there - whether to bring me a box of Kleenex or just to have a shoulder to cry on.  Luckily, a few of the staff in the ER had remembered me from previous work occasions (being a Police Officer I had brought many people to their ER, and also from having been a patient there myself over the years some had remembered my happy bubbly personality) which was a nice additional comfort.

In all I am now home and I can finally get on with life as well as begin this mental and physical healing process.  I want to thank everyone for their kind words of support and care.  Without those, I am sure it would be a much more difficult healing process.  I also know to thank my lucky stars that I have my son who remains the light of our lives and has a never ending supply of unconditional love.


  1. We have a daughter who has Down Syndrome, her name is Soraya, she is three years old now. She is an Angel.
    These children want to learn, they want to develope and they do very well when loved, supported, encouraged and shown the way.
    I congratulate you on your blog and your determination and love for your son.


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