Welcome to Our House - The Analogy ©

Having a baby is special. For some, it’s a lifelong dream, for others, a wonderful surprise. Either way, many of us have thought about taking this journey and whether it’s planned or a pleasant surprise, we all have preconceived ideas about what our child will look and be like. But what if it isn’t what we planned or expected? This is a short story I have written for parents who have or are expecting an exceptionally special child.

Welcome to our House – An analogy

After many months of dreaming, you finally decide it’s time. You are going to build that perfect house of your dreams. You have saved and saved, and now it’s time to put your plan into action. You find a wonderful, perfect piece of land in the city. It’s exactly what you are looking for – because it’s the plan that everyone talks about. You envision the all brick house sitting on luscious green grass, surrounded by a white picket fence. Inside is a marble foyer leading into a family room with beautiful oak hardwood floors. Granite lines the kitchen counter tops and there is an island sink in the middle. Upstairs has four perfect bedrooms and the master bedroom has an ensuite bathroom and an enormous walk-in closet, of course. It’s truly a dream come true, and it’s only a matter of time. You purchase the land and think to yourself, in nine short months, you will have it all.

But suddenly your agent calls to tell you, the land is not properly zoned, and the city has not approved it for building your perfect home. They have instead, given you land in the country, where an old country home sits. You are absolutely devastated, your dreams vanishing right before your eyes. You know you can’t back out now, you need a place to live, and despite it not being what you wanted, you know that somehow you will manage and that you can continue on.

You tell everyone what has happened, and everyone is disappointed, some even offering their condolences. You know that everyone else has a nice city home, and that was what you had planned, but you have to come to terms with the fact that you must learn to live in the country.

You go to see the property every month until closing and something funny happens. You start to fall in love with the place. The air is fresh, it’s peaceful and serene. There’s a pond on the land, and the house, though not a new all brick home, is quaint, and has lots of hidden potential. You soon realize it’s not a awful place, it’s just a different place. It’s slower paced than the city, less noisy and flamboyant, but it’s beautiful none the less. And in the process, you soon realize you may even get to meet some new and wonderful neighbours.

Its closing day and you suddenly find yourself full of anticipation, but you are still a little worried. After all, it isn’t what you had originally hoped for, and the house may need some repairs. But you are determined to accept it, and tackle everything one step at a time. You open the front door, and suddenly you are thrilled with what you see. The house is lovely, and has lots of character. The rooms are smaller but it’s decorated with beautiful attention and detail. The kitchen has marble instead of granite, and the bathroom has a soaker tub instead of a Jacuzzi. There isn’t a walk-in closet in sight, but the rooms all come with an indescribable view. Somehow, you just know that it was always meant to be and that this is now home.

This is my analogy of what it will be like for people who discover that they will be caring for a baby with Down syndrome. For us, it is not a terrible place to be, it is a journey full of surprises, milestones and discovery like any other child. And as the story suggests, sometimes it’s only a matter of ‘point of view’, and surprisingly, once you have been there, you don’t want to be anywhere else. The journey, like all others doesn’t come without some bumps in the road, but once you find your way, it’s all about the place you discovered, in most cases - quite by random chance
Author: Sandi Graham-McWade, Copyright
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Tuesday, June 15, 2010

My Journal - Week 43 (15Jun10)

Happy 10th Month Hunter!!

Wow, is time ever flying by.  There are moments I look back at all the pictures I have taken and I sigh.  Not because I am unhappy, but because I can't believe where all the time has gone.  Hunter is literally growing up, right before our eyes.  He's doing so much and doing it so well, I couldn't ask for more.  He has surpassed any expectations I may have had, (though we always said we would not put expectations onto Hunter, we would let things happen as they came) and because of that, he has never ceased to amaze me.  I am so proud of this little boy, and I know every mom is proud of their children, but you have to understand, there is an extra level of profoundness and comfort when we look into Hunter's eyes.  Just Saturday, I had three separate people beg me to steal Hunter - if even for a moment!  Each and every day that Hunter is out with me, he makes people coo and smile, and want to kiss every inch of his sweet little face.  I kid you not, he is a genuinely happy baby, who smiles to even the angriest person, - who you know is having a troubling day.  It's like it is some special challenge to him to make people smile again.  It's simply amazing what this child can do to/for people.  I know because I am proof, whenever I am upset, this happy little boy - my little boy, can instantly put a smile on my face and make all my troubles seem to disappear.  He is what I call, "Hunter Therapy" - and it's so very good for me!
Someone once said to me, having a child is the best thing in life you'll ever do.  They were so very right, because when someone asks me, "What's your greatest accomplishment?", I tell them, Hunter is my greatest accomplishment.  He has changed my life, for the better, made me a better person and I know it.  I think for those who are around him, he has changed them also, for the better.

So I can never gloat enough about him, but I will leave some room for a couple of videos we took today.  These were just off hand videos we decided to take, and I tell you, I just know he's going to be one of those kids who always makes you laugh.  Watch and see....


"What goes up, must come down!"  These day's Hunter is pulling himself up to a standing position, and he's certainly having fun doing it!  He has been standing up for a while now, probably more than a few months, but lately he wants you to keep your hands at his side so he can use them to pull himself up!  And it's so much fun to go back down right after!  (He's not tired, this is his new game!)


"I'm an inch worm, watch me go!"  Hunter has been on the verge of crawling (forward) for a while now!  He has demonstrated many times he can go backward, and also his new thing is while up on all fours, he will literally launch himself forward (by rocking and forcing his body forward by throwing himself), just to get where he wants to go - especially if it's just out of reach....  In doing this we have discovered that Twiggy (the cat and his personal guardian) is quite the encouraging item to tempt him to crawl - forward!

I hope these two videos gave you the same laugh or smile it did for us!  I know we can't wait for the next important or funny thing to video!

1 comment:

  1. Your right about Hunter radiating goodness. Your videos are special too. Your cat is so patient. I'm wondering if you play music and story cds for him. Our son loved Raffi, Anne Murray and all sorts of story tapes (now cds). Many are available at the library. Not sure how online works for this stuff. I know the repetition of playing them at bedtime or nap time helped our son because later in life he could recite them. He also later became very fond of MJ and knows all the lyrics to his songs. I've never been able to do that!!

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