Welcome to Our House - The Analogy ©

Having a baby is special. For some, it’s a lifelong dream, for others, a wonderful surprise. Either way, many of us have thought about taking this journey and whether it’s planned or a pleasant surprise, we all have preconceived ideas about what our child will look and be like. But what if it isn’t what we planned or expected? This is a short story I have written for parents who have or are expecting an exceptionally special child.

Welcome to our House – An analogy

After many months of dreaming, you finally decide it’s time. You are going to build that perfect house of your dreams. You have saved and saved, and now it’s time to put your plan into action. You find a wonderful, perfect piece of land in the city. It’s exactly what you are looking for – because it’s the plan that everyone talks about. You envision the all brick house sitting on luscious green grass, surrounded by a white picket fence. Inside is a marble foyer leading into a family room with beautiful oak hardwood floors. Granite lines the kitchen counter tops and there is an island sink in the middle. Upstairs has four perfect bedrooms and the master bedroom has an ensuite bathroom and an enormous walk-in closet, of course. It’s truly a dream come true, and it’s only a matter of time. You purchase the land and think to yourself, in nine short months, you will have it all.

But suddenly your agent calls to tell you, the land is not properly zoned, and the city has not approved it for building your perfect home. They have instead, given you land in the country, where an old country home sits. You are absolutely devastated, your dreams vanishing right before your eyes. You know you can’t back out now, you need a place to live, and despite it not being what you wanted, you know that somehow you will manage and that you can continue on.

You tell everyone what has happened, and everyone is disappointed, some even offering their condolences. You know that everyone else has a nice city home, and that was what you had planned, but you have to come to terms with the fact that you must learn to live in the country.

You go to see the property every month until closing and something funny happens. You start to fall in love with the place. The air is fresh, it’s peaceful and serene. There’s a pond on the land, and the house, though not a new all brick home, is quaint, and has lots of hidden potential. You soon realize it’s not a awful place, it’s just a different place. It’s slower paced than the city, less noisy and flamboyant, but it’s beautiful none the less. And in the process, you soon realize you may even get to meet some new and wonderful neighbours.

Its closing day and you suddenly find yourself full of anticipation, but you are still a little worried. After all, it isn’t what you had originally hoped for, and the house may need some repairs. But you are determined to accept it, and tackle everything one step at a time. You open the front door, and suddenly you are thrilled with what you see. The house is lovely, and has lots of character. The rooms are smaller but it’s decorated with beautiful attention and detail. The kitchen has marble instead of granite, and the bathroom has a soaker tub instead of a Jacuzzi. There isn’t a walk-in closet in sight, but the rooms all come with an indescribable view. Somehow, you just know that it was always meant to be and that this is now home.

This is my analogy of what it will be like for people who discover that they will be caring for a baby with Down syndrome. For us, it is not a terrible place to be, it is a journey full of surprises, milestones and discovery like any other child. And as the story suggests, sometimes it’s only a matter of ‘point of view’, and surprisingly, once you have been there, you don’t want to be anywhere else. The journey, like all others doesn’t come without some bumps in the road, but once you find your way, it’s all about the place you discovered, in most cases - quite by random chance
Author: Sandi Graham-McWade, Copyright
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Tuesday, January 12, 2010

My Journal - Week 21 (12Jan10)

Okay seriously, these Milestone things - is there no stopping once they start?  Talk about rapid fire.  Last night we were playing with Hunter, daddy took him for a moment so I could get something to eat, and lo and behold Hunter said, "ah mum".  Okay - this time we both heard it, and laughed.  So, once again, practical me - I just thought he was babbling away and the word just happened to come out that way.  Until today - right now.  "Mum! Mumma, Mummm"  So, now I am going crazy researching on the internet, 'when did your baby say his/her first word' and I was flabbergasted when I read that some babies were saying "momma" at three months old.  I didn't believe that was possible, until I read some more.  Now, three months is considered unusual and very early.  The norm seemed to be around five to eight months.  Well, Hunter will be five months in three days.  I know that he isn't making a connection to what he is saying and what it means (well, at least I don't believe he is making that connection, but perhaps I should be giving him the benefit of the doubt?) So, when he says it, I tell him "very good, yes Mumm is here".  Whatever this situation is, I am confused as to whether or not I should be considering this his first word.  Should a first word be just that, whatever the word spoken is, or should it be a word that the baby understands or is actually a word other than "Mumma" or "Dada"?  I think I will go with option number one.  Yay for Hunter!

Oh, and on the waving front, Hunter is still proving to anyone who will wave 'bye-bye' to him that he can do it back.  This morning, Grandma was leaving so I told her to say "goodbye" to Hunter and to wave, so she did, and like clockwork, Hunter waved back!  Good boy Hunter!  Making Momma proud!

I tell you, he is one smart baby.  Keep going Hunter, we are here to help you every step of the way!  I have posted a new poll for people to vote regarding first words - please vote!

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