Welcome to Our House - The Analogy ©

Having a baby is special. For some, it’s a lifelong dream, for others, a wonderful surprise. Either way, many of us have thought about taking this journey and whether it’s planned or a pleasant surprise, we all have preconceived ideas about what our child will look and be like. But what if it isn’t what we planned or expected? This is a short story I have written for parents who have or are expecting an exceptionally special child.

Welcome to our House – An analogy

After many months of dreaming, you finally decide it’s time. You are going to build that perfect house of your dreams. You have saved and saved, and now it’s time to put your plan into action. You find a wonderful, perfect piece of land in the city. It’s exactly what you are looking for – because it’s the plan that everyone talks about. You envision the all brick house sitting on luscious green grass, surrounded by a white picket fence. Inside is a marble foyer leading into a family room with beautiful oak hardwood floors. Granite lines the kitchen counter tops and there is an island sink in the middle. Upstairs has four perfect bedrooms and the master bedroom has an ensuite bathroom and an enormous walk-in closet, of course. It’s truly a dream come true, and it’s only a matter of time. You purchase the land and think to yourself, in nine short months, you will have it all.

But suddenly your agent calls to tell you, the land is not properly zoned, and the city has not approved it for building your perfect home. They have instead, given you land in the country, where an old country home sits. You are absolutely devastated, your dreams vanishing right before your eyes. You know you can’t back out now, you need a place to live, and despite it not being what you wanted, you know that somehow you will manage and that you can continue on.

You tell everyone what has happened, and everyone is disappointed, some even offering their condolences. You know that everyone else has a nice city home, and that was what you had planned, but you have to come to terms with the fact that you must learn to live in the country.

You go to see the property every month until closing and something funny happens. You start to fall in love with the place. The air is fresh, it’s peaceful and serene. There’s a pond on the land, and the house, though not a new all brick home, is quaint, and has lots of hidden potential. You soon realize it’s not a awful place, it’s just a different place. It’s slower paced than the city, less noisy and flamboyant, but it’s beautiful none the less. And in the process, you soon realize you may even get to meet some new and wonderful neighbours.

Its closing day and you suddenly find yourself full of anticipation, but you are still a little worried. After all, it isn’t what you had originally hoped for, and the house may need some repairs. But you are determined to accept it, and tackle everything one step at a time. You open the front door, and suddenly you are thrilled with what you see. The house is lovely, and has lots of character. The rooms are smaller but it’s decorated with beautiful attention and detail. The kitchen has marble instead of granite, and the bathroom has a soaker tub instead of a Jacuzzi. There isn’t a walk-in closet in sight, but the rooms all come with an indescribable view. Somehow, you just know that it was always meant to be and that this is now home.

This is my analogy of what it will be like for people who discover that they will be caring for a baby with Down syndrome. For us, it is not a terrible place to be, it is a journey full of surprises, milestones and discovery like any other child. And as the story suggests, sometimes it’s only a matter of ‘point of view’, and surprisingly, once you have been there, you don’t want to be anywhere else. The journey, like all others doesn’t come without some bumps in the road, but once you find your way, it’s all about the place you discovered, in most cases - quite by random chance
Author: Sandi Graham-McWade, Copyright
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Friday, February 25, 2011

My Journal - Week 78 (25Feb11)

"LET ME... LET ME!!!"

This is a phrase my own mother reminds me of often.  It's a phase she recalls me saying and going though when I was just a bit older then Hunter.  It's a phrase many mom's find themselves going though with a child who is at the age of discovery and exploration.  Hunter once again is no different.  Today, for the first time, Hunter decided that he wanted to feed himself with a spoon.  Self feeding is not new to Hunter, he's been popping food into his own mouth for quite sometime now but not with his own spoon or fork.  Today, he decided - he's going to show me.  I suppose I could have tried this sooner, on my own violation - but it never dawned on me that he would want to!  I am quite aware that he can do these things, I am just never fast enough to realize he's been ready well before I am to let him do things on his own!  So, it would seem that this time around, Hunter decided that he wasn't waiting on me to "let him" try... he showed me.  I wish I could have videoed the exact moment, but again a description and a few photos will have to do.  I had sat him down to give him is afternoon snack of a Gerber cereal bar and his last bottle of organic fruit in a jar and about half way through eating his fruit he literally grabbed the spoon out of my hands and fed himself!!  I was in total disbelief!  I was glad that John was home at the time and he promptly grabbed the camera to get a few snaps of the event!  Now, I would have let Hunter do it all on his own for the rest of the food but I didn't quite have him in a full sleeved bib (which looks like a toddler's painting smock) and I didn't want the extra laundry at that very moment (his and mine).  In the photos I have posted you will see me helping him with the last bit of fruit in the jar.  Oh, and for the record, Hunter really knew what to do on his own.  Even after he fed himself, he directed me to put the spoon back into the bottle to get more food out and back to his mouth!  Just made me realize how much he's absorbed and how he's ready way before I am to do just about everything!  I am so glad I had the photos to post but tomorrow however, I will put him in his full sleeved bib so that he can have fun exploring what it will be like to self feed with a spoon to his heart (most of his mouth and clothing's) content! I think I will have the video camera out for that one... and post it if all goes well - or even if it doesn't!!!

And in advance - I apologize for the poorer quality photos... (Unfortunately John is not the para-photographer professional... I am!)

The grab for the spoon during my feeding Hunter... "Let me! Let me!"

Hunter bravely using the spoon on his own to feed himself with Mommy helping

Can be a confusing ordeal!  "But I can manage Mommy!"

"Thank you Mommy... it's a bit easier when you help."

"I think I am getting the hang of this feeding thing!"

"However, I do believe I am better with my left hand though."

"See Mommy!  I need to dip it back into the bottle too!!"  (This surprised Mommy)

"And after it goes into my mouth!"

"Yes Mommy!  Back into the bottle again to get more!!"

"And finally back into my mouth again!  I think Mommy is really proud of me!"


1 comment:

  1. Sorry about my shaking hands, I'm not good at taking photos.

    ReplyDelete

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